Viva Cape Cod

What a minute. A gay Las Vegas... There are an awful lot of Cher impersonators in Ptown. I think Mitt is on to something.

We're going anyway

Court: Gays Can't Come to Mass. to Marry
By JAY LINDSAY
Associated Press Writer
Published March 30, 2006, 7:14 PM CST
BOSTON -- In a disappointment for the gay rights movement, the state's highest court ruled Thursday that same-sex couples from states where gay marriage is prohibited cannot tie the knot in Massachusetts.
Gov. Mitt Romney, a Republican who is considering a run for president in 2008, welcomed the decision, saying he did not want Massachusetts to become "the Las Vegas of same-sex marriage."
The Supreme Judicial Court upheld a 1913 state law that forbids nonresidents to marry in Massachusetts if their marriage would not be recognized in their home state. If the court had struck down the law, Massachusetts would have been thrown open to gay couples from across the country to get married. Then they could have returned to their home states to fight for legal recognition for those marriages.
Massachusetts "has a significant interest in not meddling in matters in which another state, the one where a couple actually resides, has a paramount interest," Justice Francis Spina wrote.
The state "can reasonably believe that nonresident same-sex couples primarily are coming to this commonwealth to marry because they want to evade the marriage laws of their home states, and that Massachusetts should not be encouraging such evasion."
The ruling leaves in legal limbo an undetermined number of out-of-state gay couples who got married in 2004 in Massachusetts when it became the first state to let gays wed.
Arline Isaacson of the Massachusetts Gay and Lesbian Political Caucus called the decision "a painful reminder that we remain second-class citizens."
"It's painful to know you'll be treated equally under the law if and only if you happen to live here," she said. "Otherwise, you are completely unequal as a gay person."
But the governor said: "It's important that other states have the right to make their own determination of marriage and not follow the wrong course that our Supreme Judicial Court put us on."
According to the Registry of Vital Records and Statistics, 7,341 gay couples tied the knot in Massachusetts between the first marriages in May 2004 and December 2005. The state does not track how many out of state couples were given licenses in Massachusetts.
Eight gay couples from surrounding states had challenged the 93-year-old law. Five of those eight couples received marriage licenses in Massachusetts before the governor ordered city and town clerks to enforce the 1913 law.
In Thursday's ruling, six justices ruled against the gay couples in two separate opinions. Only one member of the seven-justice court dissented.
However, the court sent the cases involving couples from Rhode Island and New York back to a lower court, saying it was unclear whether those states prohibit same-sex marriage.
New York's top officials have said same-sex marriage is illegal in the state, although that interpretation is being challenged.
"We do consider ourselves still married," said Amy Zimmerman, 33, of New York City, who has a marriage license with Tanya Wexler, 35. "There is a limbo element to it. We are not exactly sure what is all means yet."
In arguments before the high court in October, a lawyer for the gay couples said the 1913 law had been unused for decades until it was "dusted off" by Romney in an attempt to discriminate against same-sex couples.
As for the out-of-state couples who obtained licenses before the law was enforced, the legality of their marriages will have to be determined in their home states on a case-by-case basis, state Attorney General Thomas Reilly said.
One justice voted to strike down the 1913 law, saying it was "deeply rooted in discriminatory notions of marriage."
Gay rights advocates have argued that the law was aimed at interracial marriages.
The "resurrection of a moribund statute to deny nonresident same-sex couples access to marriage is not only troubling ... but also fundamentally unfair," Justice Roderick Ireland wrote. "This law has not been enforced for almost 100 years, and certainly never with the vitriol on display."
Copyright © 2006, The Associated Press

Shane shame

Can a heart break twice?

I was distraught when Shane (my favorite Showtime lesbian; such magnetism!) decided to tie the knot with another woman (that is, another woman besides me). Over the week, I accepted it and even started looking forward to the event, primarily to see what she would wear. Then to see her strand her lover at the alter... I may never recover. I thought she was evolving. But really, she is just fucked up.

I wonder if she and Carmen will have their matching tattoos removed, or if they will be permanent reminders of what a lousy little slouch of a woman Shane really is.

I *heart* RSVPs

B and I are thrilled to formally RSVP to say that we are absolutely coming to your wedding. We are so happy that we'll get to be there for this. I love how our two relationships have evolved in tandem over the years, and I'm so excited for the coming years of spending time together. It is really fantastic to see how happy the two of you are. Also--selfishly--your wedding might be the occasion for the only booze I allow myself this summer (I feel like indulging otherwise might be a slippery slope back to my normal lush habits). So I am looking forward to that too! Yay, champagne, happy girls, and beautiful dresses!
XO to you both,
S

Almost desperate housewife

Miss Wilbanks' booking photo as seen on www.thesmokinggun.com.
I think she did a nice job on her hair, actually. 

We have liftoff

Said wedding invites have been received. No turning back now, unless I want Kelley to alert the national press that I am a runaway bride. I don't have the eyes for that role anyway.

Yoga party of two

Kelley wants to take all the boys/butches on a deep sea fishing tour the morning of the wedding. I'm thinking the girls should meet up for a yoga class and then have a leisurely breakfast. One of my guests will be 7 months along by July. I put an email out to Movement Arts Studio (www.movearts.org) to see if they could fit all of us in. Sarah is going to be taking up more room, afterall. 

I hope gas prices decline.

 

Going postal

The invites are in the mail to 20-some guests. We entrusted them to the Wicker Park post office, which is notorious for its horrible service. Example? A Valentine's Day card from my grandmother was delivered on St. Patrick's Day. Seriously. But we're hoping since we used the outside post box, the letters will never touch the hands of an incompetent postal clerk. An irrational worry: did they need extra postage? Bad form to deliver an invite with a notice that you owe 10 cents. Egh.

Liberty & Justice

Nice couple.

This goes without saying

This is a response to my Gertrude Stein question, emailed to me by our friend and soon-to-be officiant, who could not make her way through the corn maze of blog response questions to post it herself. Her emphasis reflected.

Because the ceremony is a CELEBRATION of a RELATIONSHIP, it is imperative to find a reader who can satisfy the needs of the couple to include those closest to them and the needs of the attendees who want a lively yet brief discourse on the brides, their history separately and together, marriage in general, the socio-political ramifications of the ceremony, the merits of choosing someone of similar height, why Irish step dancing is growing in popularity...closing with an organically produced champagne toast.

If a couple is able to pin down someone like that, the rest is smooth sailing.

Mary Joan

Are you talking to me?

We caught the tail end of The L Word last night, just enough to see Dana flatline and a lame promotional video on breast cancer. Note to writers: if you have to include a several minute video justifying killing a popular character, kill someone else. But that's not my main concern. My main concern is that Shane, SHANE, proposes to Carmen in the previews for next week. Umm, she was supposed to propose to me at the last minute in July and I was supposed to have a heartfelt moment of reflection where I choose between her and Kelley and then go with Kelley because what we have is real and what I have with Shane is imaginary and based primarily on how I wished I had her skinny little body to slink around in.

Rose is a rose is a rose

Question: When asking friends or family to be a reader at your ceremony, should the decision be based on your relationship or their ability to pull off Gertrude Stein?

Reserved

And I thought I was excited about our trip out East.

One of our guests emailed me Monday to say she's already booked a room at the Moffett House, the inn next door to the Secret Garden, and reserved tickets for a whale watch the morning before the ceremony!

I haven't even mailed the invitations. But having all the information on my companion blog, www.theweddingdetails.com, basically serves as one.

To-do list

Kati's four months to go, things-to-do list.

1. Mail the invitations.
2. Finalize the Davenport's reception with the manager.
3. Work out a deal with the Davenport's entertainer.
4. Touch base with Tom at the Secret Garden Inn regarding cake.
5. Email the florist.
6. Seek out a good hair dresser in Ptown.
7. Figure out what I want to do the morning of. Kelley is taking the boys deep sea fishing. A three-hour tour, so to speak.
8. Figure out if I'm going to have any showers. I do want to be gifted with new lingerie, afterall.
9. Get in shape. :)
10. Find a pair of awesome slippers to go with my dress.
11. Burn wedding and reception music.

Non sequitur

I can tell the ceremony is getting close. While watching Desperate Housewives last night Kelley randomly asked me how I was going to wear my hair. Any other time I'd reply, "when?" But I know to fill in the blank with "at the wedding." Other variations of this question include: What are you going to say (at the wedding)? What are you going to do in the morning (before the wedding)? We're going to need some private time after (the ceremony). And, whose going to watch Judy (while we're having some private time)?

Evil dykesister

While imbibing Saturday night at The Closet with our Elmira friends, we ran into an old acquaintance. Last we saw her, she was buying a condo with her life partner. But in the two years that passed, the couple bought a house together, got married in Canada, suffered the loss of one of their mother's to cancer and, unceremoniously, broke up. So this girl was in fine form, out to prevent us from making her same mistake. Only, she didn't tell me that. I took a cab home sick from drinking too much cheap vodka and gin, and she cornered Kelley to warn her about committing to a younger woman. This message bothered KQ all weekend. Just because her relationship didn't work doesn't mean that our love is weak, my dear said. Here, here!

Cape Grace

Kelley will not have to appear naked at the ceremony afterall.

Guests in from Elmira, N.Y., helped her select proper attire off the rack at Marshall Field's over the weekend on Michigan Avenue.

Diane, a longtime friend on Kelley's who we expect to be a reader at the ceremony, found a beautiful pair of linen trousers for my bride in the Ralph Lauren section.

I plucked a linen blouse and silk camie to match.

And Mary Joan, our officiant, used her powers for good by finding us glasses of white wine, delivered to us on the department store floor by a little dyke in a tuxedo. How very appropriate.

Babe alert.