Bridezilla

I bought two thrift store wedding dresses today. One is three sizes too big. The other is one size too small. But I figured between the two, I could fashion a Bridezilla costume for Halloween, or some other variation on that theme. Pregnant bride? Frankenstein's bride? Runaway bride? Bride of Chuckie? Like a virgin? Something will work. Kelley is a bit disappointed. She wanted to wear her sailor suit and have me dress up like a 1940s housewife to recreate that famous -- but staged -- kiss photo in, was it?, Times Square. I think she should just wear a ball and chain -- or one of the dresses. We could just go as a gay wedding. In the same vein, a couple friends of mine are going as Roe Vs. Wade. One is carrying a paddle, the other wearing wading boots.